STROKE ONE FOR THE HANDSOME ONE

Hey Hey Hey , Dr Keough is back. Now I'm gonna educate Malaysian about stroke. So if you are from Uganda or Tokyo or Mexico or Nigeria,or the rest of NATO countries, please navigate away from my blog..shooh shooh..( exception to Libya and Taliban member and if you are  pole dancer)


Stroke is the third largest cause of death in Malaysia.  *now puliss show me three finger*

Heart disease and cancer is on top of stroke.(this sound vaguely sexual but trust me there is nothing sexual about death statistic)


It is considered to be  most common cause of severe disability, and every year, an estimated 40,000 f*cking people in Malaysia suffer from f*cking stroke. Anyone can have a stroke, you, me , your aunty, my uncle, your cousin's neighbor's ex husband's sister-in-law's step dad's hooker. Children also can kena stroke, but  most of the cases affect adults.




WHAT THE F*CK IS STROKE?
A stroke is a brain damaged when the blood supply to the brain is disrupted. The brain is the nerve center (not celcom center) of the body, controlling every thing we do or think, as well as controlling automatic functions like breathing,having a boner and multiple orgasm.


In order to work, the brain needs a constant blood supply which carries vital oxygen and nutrients. Like your car, no oil cannot jalan mah.


Brain damage affects your senses, your speech and understanding of language. One side of your body may be paralyzed,( so cannot play futsal or stalk people's mom anymore).




TYPE OF STROKE

1. Ischaemic stroke,(ish-kemik se-trok) occurs when a blood vessel kena block, so blood cannot get to your brain. Like police road bload lar, kena tahan polis, cannot go clubbing ma. Except that in your brain there is no police to road block but got blood clot. How come got clot meh?? Cholestlol lar,that Mc Dollah you eat diam-diam without giving me a bite. serve you right! padan mukan (moral of the story, share Mc Dollah with your friend so they also kena stroke)
2. Haemorrhagic stroke, (he-mo-rajikk se-trok) is when a blood vessel in the brain bursts,(meletup/ explode) causing a hemorrhage(bleed).Like your house plumbing lar, sometimes the pipe burst right?  How the f*ck blood vessel burst meh? A vely vely long time high blood pressure is the villain.So if got blood pressure must fast-fast control ok?

picture of Keough stopped by the polis when he wanna go clubbing

RISK FACTOR FOR STROKE

Modifiable risk factor

.Good news! Meaning you can delete this risk factor from your life.

• Untreated high blood pressure (hypertension).
• A diet high in salt, fatty, sugary foods
• Diabetes (hence, the diet control in point above)
• trolling on Apple Waffle
• Atrial fibrillation (  irregular heartbeat) increases the risk of blood clots forming in the heart, which may then dislodge and travel to the brain.
• Smoking.
• Regular heavy drinking drink two small glass is ok lar.
•   fan of Justin Bieber or K-POP

Non-modifiable Risk Factor
BAD NEWS. You gonna have a new step-dad. Risk factors that cannot be controlled, meaning no matter what you do, you will always have this risk factor, god make you this way.

• Age over 55, and the older you are, the more chance you get stroke
•  Men are at a higher risk of stroke than women (but please don't think of changing your gender through surgery)
• ¨Having a close relative with Christ Brown stroke increases the risk, maybe father, brother,uncle etc etc
• have sex with Jew

WHAT THE F*CK STROKE WILL DO TO MY BEAUTIFUL BODY?

•  suddenly you cannot move arm/leg very well, arm/leg feel very weak
• suddenly one side of face become lower
• cannot talk properly
• cannot see properly
• headache
• vomit
• confuse
• have urge to donate money to Keough

and to make matter worse, most are permanent disabilities....... :'(    more permanent than your relationship! (we all know your homosexual relationship with your friend's dad wont last forever)

TREATMENT
1.smack head on the National Monument of Brazil  four times
1. Blood pressure drugs--- to reduce blood pressure lar, what else. Blood pressure drug such as Diuretics to rid the body of excess fluids+salt  and Beta-blockers to reduce the heart rate and the heart's output of blood
2. Anti-platelet drugs and aspirin---prevent blood clots
3. Drug for atrial fibrillation (irregular heartbeat)
4. kiss Taylor Swift every Sunday
4.Cholesterol-lowering drugs
5.Drugs for Diabetes Mellitus
6.Regular Medical Check-Up
7. Read Apple Waffle..(it was scientifically proven in Planet Nemeck)

A random Nameck-ian is happy after the treatment of  20 post of Apple Waffle